As you can probably tell from this writing today, I was unable to take a break to enjoy the main story quest of Final Fantasy 14: Dawntrail. However, I was able to play it during my lunch break. That opening hour filled my heart in a wonderful, warm, fuzzy way.

That's why I'm even more concerned that the level 96 crafted equipment is a set of BDSM gimp outfits that would make a cenobite blush.

Now, we've seen these sets in previous live letters, but I don't think it really prepares you to see your own character being modeled.

The Gomphotherium crafting set, which is not yet available but can be previewed on the local market board, is more of an exercise in how uncomfortable you can make other party members than practical adventure equipment. I'll let each of you speak for yourself in this area. .......

I don't want to think about what a Pictomancer in that casting set might be drawing.

I don't usually jump to accusing MMOs of skimpy costumes; Dawntrail is billed as a "beach episode: extended edition." So what kind of horror show awaits us in the second half?

My guess is that the idea behind these sets is less "my safeword is a chocobo" and more of a "Mad Max" homage. We know that Charoani, one of the expansion zones, is basically the Wild West, complete with saloons and trains. With a little less Clint Eastwood and a little more Australian outback style, you can bet that Mad Max's D.N.A. will be used for armor. And perhaps even on the floorboards (sorry, sorry).

Anyway, if you want to get your hands on some spiked leather, you'll have to wait a while. With a level 96 crafting set, it's unlikely that anyone will get that high of a gatherer or crafter for at least another 24 hours. I would say all weekend, but the eager players of the "palm apprentice"/"land" are very powerful and unstoppable. Good luck.