The sixth episode of Prime TV's "Fallout" series presents a pre-war Galaxy News broadcast hosted by stage and screen debonair star Cooper Howard (Walton Goggins). The broadcast takes place deep inside the Vault-Tec vaults, where Howard takes us on a tour of the Model 96-JQ-1164, built in a sturdy three-foot-thick lead enclosure. Says Howard: "It's strong enough to keep out the rads ...... And strong enough to prevent red," Howard says.

Wink.

This is more of a sales pitch than a news broadcast. Howard charmingly suggests that you call Vault-Tec today and purchase your own residence in the Vault, and a phone number appears on the screen.

Well, I picked up the phone and called, because I don't want to be dead or ghoulish if a bunch of atomic bombs are dropped on my neighborhood. I was hoping for a little easter egg, the beginning of an ARG, a clue to discovering the secret of the vaults, or some other interesting lore about the fallout.

Uh... No." This is what it sounds like when you call the number. Please turn up the sound. LOUD WARNING:

I'm no genius, but I guess things didn't go as planned at Vault-Tec. On the other hand, 20 seconds of screams of terror may constitute an ARG.

Maybe it is better to take my chances outside. Nevertheless, if you want to secure your place in the Vault, please refer to Fallout's ranking of all Vaults.