If you listened to your super earth superiors (and you should), you would know that the flying insects in "Hell Diver 2" are a myth created by insect-loving fascists and the blue lasers are a figment of their imagination. Unless you've seen the video evidence, you shouldn't, because that would be high treason.

If for some reason you are (hypothetically) involved in such a thought crime, there is video and photographic evidence of both cryptids that suggest, with varying degrees of justification, a new enemy type called Terminids and the return of the super-advanced Illuminate faction of Hell Divers 1. You know what I'm talking about.

Personally, I find flying insects more convincing than blue laser beams. Laser weapons turn blue when they bounce off armor, and it is fairly easy to edit a screenshot to change the hue. However, the "flying bug" is more likely, since a complete video is available.

If the bugs and blasts are indeed an inside job, they are certainly unusual. In all my missions, I have never come across a gnarly or azure cannonball fragments. The following photos, if not doctored by that sneaky bot, would be a phenomenal find.

I can't stress enough how ridiculous this screenshot (thanks to GamesRadar) looks on paper: two ultra-rare events happening simultaneously and in the same frame. It's like trying to take a snapshot of Bigfoot and having a grainy UFO appear just as the film develops.

Even more interesting is the sheer desperation with which user wildcard17o (who calls himself "your favorite delusional hell-diver") tries to share his findings. Complete panic, frenzied enthusiasm, all expressed in capital block letters. Despite the onslaught of accusations of treason, Wildcard17o said they would continue diving to prove their innocence.

There is also fan-made advice from Super Earth that the blue beams are merely a hallucinatory side effect of exposure to termicide: "Hallucinations don't scratch your armor!" .

Frankly, fake or not, I just enjoy the increasingly unhinged conspiracy theories that surface. Arrowhead's denial of everything that comes out of gaming fans is exceptional. The flying bugs are almost certainly cheating by Joel's Upper Management, but the blue beam could be a complete fake. Shake your head, Pilestead, the truth is out there.