Baldur's Gate 3 has been released to much fanfare. Another indicator is the PC Gamer Slack, where characters, quests, secrets, bard idolatry, and modding goats so they can have backstories are discussed.

Despite this mindless excitement, I don't think any of the PC Gamer staffers playing this have actually read the entire terms of service. That's because, as Twitter user Krenbot discovered, Larian's lawyers (the very scariest subclass) slipped a clause about players' "additional obligations under the Eldritch Act" into the game's terms of service near the end.

"It's time for a short break," the technically-enforceable text reads.

"Having endured the above numerous legalese provisions, I already understand that your mind is longing for a respite.

"Therefore, be vigilant to set aside the weighty law books and accept the lighter path of ancient customs and mystical stipulations that govern the fair people, and in accepting this pact, agree to refrain from dealing with the Fae, Infernals, or any other creature of eldritch origin. I hope you will. Nevertheless, if you cannot bear the seductive melody whispered by their malicious words, we reserve the right to sever all professional or social relations with the end user and seek appropriate redress from the Morninglord."

Well, I guess this is not like a defense attorney who makes you turn over your home and children for the privilege of playing. In this case, you would only risk being killed instantly by Morninglord.

The release of Baldur's Gate 3 has hit Steam like a giant iceberg, boasting over half a million players as of this writing, and the folks at PC Gamer are just beginning to unravel the game's mysteries and secrets. As one anonymous Scottish guide writer put it.

BG3 is a long-term game. And yes, everyone (and his dog) will be save-scumming for life from this game. The only problem is that the game's first notable bug prevents exactly that.